Friday, November 21, 2008

In Florida, Moving On and Trying to Heal

My move to Florida is done. I am very glad that I don’t have to pack another box or drive another Uhaul for a while. It was long drive. Since I was the only one driving, we had to stop for the night. The first stop was in New Jersey (almost into Delaware), the second stop was in North Carolina and then we spent a night in Fernandina Beach, FL with Ryan’s mom. The next morning, Tuesday, we arrived at mom’s house in Florahome. We spent a few days unloading the truck and putting the essentials inside and the rest in storage. We registered Princess Ivi for school and did some running around regarding that.

Things got pretty bad shortly after we got here. Ryan did not help in any way. He didn’t drive, he didn’t stay awake, he didn’t help unload the truck. Nothing.

Then on Saturday, he caused a huge scene and jeopardized my mom’s job, her home and the only place Princess Ivi and I have to stay. He did this by putting his need for drugs above anything else.

I have been feeling for some time now that Ryan was a selfish person who puts his needs above his own. I also discovered several instances when he lied to me. He also lied to many people in general conversations. He also exhibits abusive behavior and then justifies it by saying he was just angry, or he was just hurt, or he didn’t mean it.

Due to his behavior on Saturday, he was told to leave my mother’s home (owned by her bosses and provided to her as part of her pay). I do know that he checked himself into rehab. But because of his continued treatment of Princess Ivi and I, I have made the difficult decision to end my relationship with him. I wish him well but I have to take care of Princess Ivi and myself.

So at this point, I am relying on my relationship with my family and friends, my knitting, and my faith to help me heal.

No comments: