Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Nothing is more difficult than parenting a teenager...except maybe living with my mother

Man, parenting a teenage girl is tough. Especially when that girl is an unhappy one.

School is back in session but instead of looking forward to it, even a little, she doesn’t want to go and it is a fight every morning. Most mornings, she says she has a stomachache. I hate having to yell at her first thing in the morning. I hate having to yell at her at all. It makes me the mean parent but considering I am the only one she has, I guess I have to take that role.

The other night when I asked her what was wrong she said that she has no friends (which isn’t necessarily true), no one “gets” her (but, hey, she is 13 so no one is supposed to “get” her) and she hates it here (in Florida, living in the same house as my mom and I totally “get” her on that one because we need our own space).

We have been tossing around ideas on how to solve the current problem which is that both Princess Ivi and myself are ready to move on with our lives. We were considering saving up and moving out here in Florida around November. We would have moved about 12 miles away from Mom and that much closer to my office. The thought was that we would move and money would be extremely tight (being a single mom sucks) but at least we would be able to live for ourselves in our own space.

There are things, of course, that must be done in order for us to be able to move in July. First, we must save money. To do that Princess Ivi and I have decided the following:
  1. We will go grocery shopping every other Saturday (after cashing my paycheck). The two of us will wake up in the morning (for a change of pace) and go while Mom is working. This way, we will not have to buy the things she insists we need. We will also make a better grocery list and post it on the fridge so that throughout the week things can be added to the list.
  2. We will buy the Sunday paper to get coupons and we will shop at Winn Dixie using online coupons. We will also look through the sale flyer and base purchases of meat and produce on that.
  3. I will start bringing my lunch to work every day. (Not just occasionally.) This will reduce spending because fast food is expensive and even if I picked up a salad at the grocery store (from the produce department), they are expensive too.
  4. We will cut down on unnecessary spending like magazines, books, etc.
  5. I will give Mom $40 every other week. I am going to tell her that I am giving this money to her to do whatever she wants (fix her car, buy her cigarettes, whatever).
  6. We will stick with our budget.
  7. We will save at least $200 from each paycheck toward moving/saving. We will budget $100 toward debts that must be paid before moving. Budget surplus money will be put in savings. Any bonuses will be placed in savings.
  8. Tax return will be used to either pay down car loan principal or to pay any large debt.
  9. We will make homemade gifts for everyone using supplies on hand (yarn, fabric, etc.).
  10. When we get the urge to spend money because we are bored, we will go to the library, go to a free event, craft, play board games, watch movies we own, etc.

Now, I just have to figure out how to get Princess Ivi to go to school for this year. Hmmmm......

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I can so relate to this. Being single, raising a teen daughter. But living with Mom?! I would rather slit my wrists. LOL! 13 is really tough. Have you thought about a good therapist and maybe anti-depressent? Teen angst just sucks no matter how you look at.